Remembering Daddy

Dear Daddy,

How are you? I bet you’re kicking butt up there. 🙂 I hadn’t written to you in forever so I sat down today and decided to pen down (more like type) a few words. Today being the big day and all, it made a lot more sense to write to you today. I’m sure you are eager to know how everybody is over here. Well, we’re all doing pretty great. Mom’s well, still working, still complaining about authorities, still loud. I’m good too and so is Mukul. We have a good life here and a cute house of our own. I do have an inkling that you’d have thought our house was too empty, or not furnished enough, but that’s ok dad, coz we like it that way. 🙂

I was watching some lame TV show today, the kind you and I used to watch all the time, amidst all the laughter. It was one of those talent hunt shows and the judge guy tells one of the contestants that he’s gonna make his folks real proud some day. It was so profound and poetic, I was surprised at the emotion I felt. But daddy, the fact is I’ve become that person. I’ve been this way for 7 years now. Ever since you decided to leave me. I miss you daddy. I really do! If there was anything I could do to bring you back, I would but sometimes, things work the way they do for a reason. Though I’ll never fully understand your actions and the reasons behind them, or the way you lived your life but I’ll forever carry with me the mystery that is your death.

This is the 7th year of your death, and I can’t believe it’s been that long. I remember my birthday parties and I remember you coming to the train station to pick me up, every time I’d come home from college. I remember seeing the pride in your face whenever I took part in school programs. I cannot forget our endless debate on politics, economics, psychology and what not. Those were some good times dad. I can’t forget the time I was hospitalised for jaundice and you were so worried you told me as long as I got well soon, you’d get me anything under the sky. You were so freaked out! come on dad, its just jaundice. 🙂

I know there will never be another you, and I don’t want there to be either, but sometimes I miss you so much that it gets tough to say it out loud in words and then I wonder whether I’m losing my mind or is this real. I’m sure I’ll see you, some day but until then, you take care of yourself and continue kicking butt, coz I wouldn’t expect anything less from you.

I love you dad!

Your daughter

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My mommy-My hero

So, I realise I haven’t blogged in a while but here’s the thing, with work and a commute of over 2 hours (everyday- ONE WAY) and a complete home to take care of (including cooking) with no help whatsoever, can be tough!!! phewwww…! 🙂

And nothing gets better when on top of it all you have the flu. Your nose feels like its gonna fall off because it’s so raw from the constant wiping. You feel like your body is heavier than lead and you have a 2 year pounding on a drum inside your head. Uggggghhh!!!

Falling sick is the worst thing that can happen to anybody, especially me. Why? you ask? I guess it’s because I can’t feel as sorry for anybody else as I do for myself now, can I? 🙂

I was so unwell last week that I could barely get out of bed. But, my husband dropped me off at my mommy’s for some serious TLC.

Whether you are 5 years old or 50…. I honestly think that whenever you are sick all you can think of is your mom.

I don’t know about anybody else, but whenever I am sick I crave for my mother’s hands, stroking my hair like she used to whenever I used to fall sick as a child. My mom pouring me a hot bowl of soup, fluffing my pillows, tucking me in…. Aaah! The works. 🙂

A mother’s love is a mother’s love and nothing can stand up to it, not even you-oh flu virus..!

When I was younger, I used to fake being sick on school days (as I am sure everybody has done so when they were children). Atleast I used to try. My mom would never buy into my bluff and would always say “go to school, and if you start feeling sick, come back home”. Disappointing as it was, I’d still go to school because you see my true motive was not to avoid school (although that was an added bonus) it was to get my mom to stay home with me. 🙂
And funny as it is ironic, I know for a fact, that’s exactly what I’ll be saying to my kids when they try to fake being sick on school days 🙂

It wasn’t the “quality time” we would spend together, it was just the idea of knowing she is at home because between my teenaged sister and me and my dad (who, by the way my mother claims, was no less than a 5 year old child, when at home) and a full time job, I used to think my mom doesn’t have any time dedicated especially to me. But I realise now how much time she actually did dedicate to me. She took years off from a full time career to be with me, she tucked me into bed every night, said my prayers with me, made me delicious food whenever I wanted it, irrespective of how tired she was, and how she sacrificed sleep, food, comfort, basically everything to sit next to me when I was in the hospital for an appendectomy.
She was unwell herself but she did not move from my bedside. She wouldn’t eat but she would make sure I am well fed, she wouldn’t sleep but she would make sure I got several hours of sleep.
Even today, she manages to take care of me even though we don’t live together anymore. I have a home of my own now and I am the “go to for anything” person in my house, I am the one who “takes care of everybody” but my mommy, still takes care of me.

My husband and I continue to be amazed and surprised at the amount of energy, enthusiasm and quiet strength that lies within her.

We appreciate you Mom, we love you and we inspire to be like you-more and more each day- My mommy, my hero! 🙂

Have you thought of all the things your mother has done for you in the past? Or continues to do even today?

Take some time off, call your mom and tell her you love her. She may know it, but would be so nice for her to hear it, out of the blue, randomly, because she did and she does all that she does for you because of those 3 words.

Thanks for reading everybody, and don’t forget to tell your mom, how much you love her. That’s what I do, everyday! 🙂

The first of many letters to my nephew Vihaan

Dearest Darling Vihaan,

How are you sweetheart? I know you’re too young to read this right now, but eventually one day you will, and it will surely make you laugh.

You are almost 6 months old, and its hard to imagine what things were like 6 months ago, before you were born. I’m sure your mom and dad will tell you how eagerly everybody has waited for you to arrive, and you’re mom will enlighten you on all the things that happened while she was carrying you in her tummy (my mom tells the weirdest stories about me, making it sound like I played soccer while I was inside her-lol). We waited for months for you to come and enrich our lives with your existence.

I know that by the time you read this letter 2013 may actually be pre-historic times for you but sweetie, this is the year we realized how 1 person’s presence in our life can bring so much joy. You ARE a bundle of joy- beautiful, melodious and so charismatic I mean your aunts and uncles and grandmas and grandpas across India and the world are all waiting everyday for a new picture of yours to be uploaded on Facebook or to receive a video of you laughing so we can have one glimpse of you and bask in the glory of your awesomeness. 😀

You will never fully realize the effect you have had or the meaning of your presence but even so, know that you are loved and protected and shared by so many people.  You are our second generation, and it starts with you. Your mom, your Aunt Shyna and I were talking about how we have now shifted into a different era. It is a new era, and it’s NOW, it’s here!!! In some way, your mom actually ushered the new era in, at least for us. 🙂

Meeting you was such a joy and a treat, that leaving you was actually sad. I wish we had more time together but we have years and years to make up for it. You are our rockstar, the apple of our eye and without even knowing it, you make us proud every day, every minute.

God Bless you!!!

xoxoxo

Aunt Divya