40 Fantastic things about Delhi & Delhiites

Being a Delhiite (any person who belongs to New Delhi, India) there are soooo many things we see and experience every day that are actually outside the ordinary. Interestingly, some of those things we have actually fallen into a habit of seeing or even doing without giving it much thought and it certainly doesn’t strike us as odd. But, then along comes an email like the one I got today called: 40 fantastic things about Dilli (that’s how you pronounce Delhi in Hindi) and you realize “Holy Crap! That shit is so true” 🙂 I actually admire the man/woman who took the time out to write down these quirky little things that only Dilli-wallas (again people from New Delhi India) can relate to.

Read for yourself and if you are from Delhi or know somebody from Delhi, then you know this is true! Read and enjoy and thank you to the perceptive and observant person who put this list together.

40 Fantastic things about saddi Dilli (our Delhi)

You know you are from Delhi when…..

  1. You drink alcohol only on Monday, Wednesday , and Thurday to Sunday evenings. And try not to drink on Tuesday.
  2. Treating a friend means – Daaru Shaaru te kabbab shabaab. (Booze and Kebabs)
  3. Even in the most posh colonies, you hear, “Aaloo lelo !!!, Bhindi le lo !!!! Pyaaz le lo !!!!, Tamatar le lo……” (Potatoes for sale, Okra for sale, Onions for sale and tomatoes for sale)
  4. And you hear women asking the vegetable vendor “Bhaiyaa dhaniya hari mirchi nahi diya!” [Even with Half a kilo Carrot – Dhania & Hari Mirch (coriander and green chillies) is expected to be free ] 😉
  5. A place to meet is Mocha, (CCD), Barista, Hookah.
  6. You use the word “setting” or “jugaad” at-least once a day. (Jugaad:  a colloquial Hindi word that can mean an innovative fix or a simple work-around)
  7. You have not visited either of – Qutub Minar, Red Fort, Lotus Temple. That’s only for tourists, so Delhiites say.
  8. You ride on the cycle rickshaw in NOIDA (more populary known as NEODA) – haggle over the price, but still pity rickshaw walla’s condition and give him what he asked.
  9. You glare at people who call Gol Gappas as Pani Puri!
  10. You always ask the vendor “Bhaiya yeh Gol-Gappe Aate ki hai ya Sooji ke?” (Are the Gol gappas made of flour or semolina?)
  11. Schools are the best is Delhi not because of CBSE, but because you’ve had school cancelled thrice due to cold in winters & summer vacations preponed due to sudden increase heat in Summers and at least two Rainy Day off during Monsoon.
  12. You have been to a wedding at a Mehrauli farmhouse at least once.
  13. You understand all important words in Punjabi & Punjabi “helping verbs” like teri maa di, teri bahen di… oye madar @#$% … oye bahen @#$$. Almost every Delhiite understands Punjabi to an extent. PUNJABI unites everyone.
  14. You call the waiter in the restaurant “boss” or “Pappey” & tack on “yaar” “bhai” to almost every sentence.
  15. You know that Pappay Da Dhaba or Kake Da Hotel has better butter chicken than Taj. You’ve at least tried it once! And you see a BMW, a Porsche OR a Mercedes parked outside it!
  16. You describe practically every other person on the planet as “Vella”. (‘Idle’ or Nikamma in Punjabi).
  17. You see middle-aged Aunties wearing Gucci shades and holding LV bags having Gol-Gappas in GK or Bhelpuri in South Ex along with Diet Coke !
  18. You call every stranger ‘Bhaiyya’.
  19. You refer to East Delhi as ‘Jamuna Paar’.
  20. You refer to AIIMS as Medical.
  21. Pretty girls as Totta, Maal or Bamb (Punjabi for Bomb).
  22. Aashiq mizaz boys as Majnu di Aulad !
  23. You dont buy tickets for a music concert or cricket match, but try to use political contacts… of the deputy secretary of the chief secretary of the Minister of State for Khadi.
  24. You overtake everyone from the wrong side and stare into his/her eyes while doing so.
  25. You have at least two cars and a motorbike at home.
  26. And you have fought at least once every month with neighbors over parking…
  27. You park your Car and take a Auto-rickshaw to Lajpat Nagar / Rajouri/ Kamla Nagar/ Karol Bagh. But CP, you don’t get parking space easily, yet you go always in your own vehicle.
  28. And then you say apni Kanvense (conveyance) howe na ta badi Kanvinyance (convenience) hondi hai ji !!!!!
  29. You have bribed a traffic cop (Mama) at least once.
  30. You know that a farmhouse has nothing to do with cattle or farming. It is luxurious hangout for whole night.
  31. You use “contacts” (jugaad) for everything, from getting movie tickets to restaurant bookings to play-school admissions.
  32. You have had Anda parantha outside Vikram hotel and Bun Omlette at Dhaula Kuan, Kulfi at Karol Bagh, Gol Gappe at India Gate, Dosa at Madras Hotel, Chana/Kulcha at Scindia House and Chaat at UPSC.
  33. Metro rail is your Pride but you travel in your Car.
  34. You think going the mall for shopping is equivalent to walking the ramp at Milan fashion week. You break out all the labels, because when else will you use your Prada, Dior and Louis Vuitton bags?
  35. You feel indicating which way you are going to turn your vehicle is an information security leak.
  36. You are a good driver coz you are correct in your guess of what the driver in the front vehicle will do.
  37. The only time you went to the Chidiya Ghar (Zoo) was on a school picnic.
  38. You expect around 10 FM STATIONS in every city! Woho.!
  39. DESPITE all the good and bad……..You still Love Delhi…
  40. You keep singing ….. Dilli hai Dil Walon ki….. Oye Balle Balle !!!

 

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To be or not to be….My frenemy!

Quite often we come across people we just don’t like. Maybe, a colleague, or a relative, or somebody who provides an essential service, like the maid perhaps? or the dry cleaner?

You cannot deny that there are such people in your life. However hard you try, these people just don’t make it to your “Favorite people” list. And 90% of the time you don’t really have any option but to put up with them. So what do you do when you come face to face with a person like that? Do you look the other way? Do you gulp everything you’re dying to say or do you actually go ahead an say it, fully aware that the person on the receiving end needs to deal with you, as much as you need to deal with them?

All that aside, then there is the case of frenemies. 😀

A lot of women, tend to refer to other women in their circles as “frenemies“. Ever wondered where the term frenemies really came from?? You have a friend. You call that person a friend because (and I’m referring to a woman’s perspective ONLY) you really can’t call her anything else and she is nice to you and even polite, but she is more than willing to turn around and stab you in the back at the blink of an eye. But the chances of that happening are more likely none, because she’s friends with you for a reason- either you’re in the same circle of friends, or you share a class or you both need each other to help finish the ugly project you have to submit for midterms, or better yet- she is the girl your brother is dating.

That’s my favorite one! Your brother calls you both his special girls, and he assumes you will get along fabulously because you have him in common and which 2 unrelated women in the world, did NOT get along when their connection was a man they both would kill for???? Men are weird like that. They don’t really understand the complexities of female relationships, and I don’t blame them. Even women sometimes cannot understand the complexities of their own relationships with other women. 🙂

So, how do frenemies behave with each other? I haven’t come up with a term for the behavior yet, but I will soon.

Till I come up with said term, I’d like to call it sweet sarcasm.

My husband (Mukul) enjoys doing his own version of sweet sarcasm to people he doesn’t really like and it can be extremely funny, when you’re viewing it from a third party perspective. He doesn’t have any ‘frenemies‘ per se, so he just does it to people he has no option but to deal with, but he won’t let them take him down by being over the top nice either. That’s Mukul for you! 🙂

So here is what Mukul does: He smiles, shrugs and says all that he wants to. If it’s somebody who is related to us through blood or marriage: Mukul puts his palms together, bows his head in respect and then says what he wants.

Putting your palms together is a sign of respect in most south Asian countries. So, by doing that Mukul shows them (relatives) respect, which kind of seals their lips because the physical gesture of showing respect outweighs the words, in that one moment. Also, he does everything simultaneously, which confuses a lot of people and they don’t have as much time to formulate an appropriate reply in their head. Personally, I think that is fantastic!!!!

It’s an acquired skill, and I am yet to acquire it 🙂

Sweet sarcasm or not, you gotta deal with your so called frenemies, or whatever version of frenemies you have. How I like to deal with it is to smile away to glory and keep looking at that person, they know what your thinking, they know you can take them down, and most of all, they know they can’t do without you.

But then again, can you?

In conclusion, I think we all need a frenemy or 2 in our lives, especially women.

Come on girls, can you honestly say our conversations are just as lively if we are NOT bashing our frenemies?? 🙂

When women meet other women they always ask themselves this question in their heads (Probably ask it out loud in sororities):

Hmmmm….To be or not to be? My frenemy?

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