40 Fantastic things about Delhi & Delhiites

Being a Delhiite (any person who belongs to New Delhi, India) there are soooo many things we see and experience every day that are actually outside the ordinary. Interestingly, some of those things we have actually fallen into a habit of seeing or even doing without giving it much thought and it certainly doesn’t strike us as odd. But, then along comes an email like the one I got today called: 40 fantastic things about Dilli (that’s how you pronounce Delhi in Hindi) and you realize “Holy Crap! That shit is so true” ūüôā I actually admire the man/woman who took the time out to write down these quirky little things that only Dilli-wallas (again people from New Delhi India) can relate to.

Read for yourself and if you are from Delhi or know somebody from Delhi, then you know this is true! Read and enjoy and thank you to the perceptive and observant person who put this list together.

40 Fantastic things about saddi Dilli (our Delhi)

You know you are from Delhi when…..

  1. You drink alcohol only on Monday, Wednesday , and Thurday to Sunday evenings. And try not to drink on Tuesday.
  2. Treating a friend means – Daaru Shaaru te kabbab shabaab. (Booze and Kebabs)
  3. Even in the most posh colonies, you hear, “Aaloo lelo !!!, Bhindi le lo !!!! Pyaaz le lo !!!!, Tamatar le lo……” (Potatoes for sale, Okra for sale, Onions for sale and tomatoes for sale)
  4. And you hear women asking the vegetable vendor “Bhaiyaa dhaniya hari mirchi nahi diya!” [Even with Half a kilo Carrot – Dhania & Hari Mirch (coriander and green chillies)¬†is expected to be free ] ūüėČ
  5. A place to meet is Mocha, (CCD), Barista, Hookah.
  6. You use the word “setting” or “jugaad” at-least once a day. (Jugaad:¬† a colloquial Hindi word that can mean an innovative fix or a simple work-around)
  7. You have not visited either of – Qutub Minar, Red Fort, Lotus Temple. That’s only¬†for tourists, so Delhiites say.
  8. You ride on the cycle rickshaw in NOIDA (more populary known as NEODA) – haggle over the price, but still pity rickshaw walla’s condition and give him what he asked.
  9. You glare at people who call Gol Gappas as Pani Puri!
  10. You always ask the vendor “Bhaiya yeh Gol-Gappe Aate ki hai ya Sooji ke?” (Are the Gol gappas made of flour or semolina?)
  11. Schools are the best is Delhi not because of CBSE, but because you’ve had school cancelled thrice due to cold in winters & summer vacations preponed due to sudden increase heat in Summers and at least two Rainy Day off during Monsoon.
  12. You have been to a wedding at a Mehrauli farmhouse at least once.
  13. You understand all important words in Punjabi & Punjabi “helping verbs” like teri maa di, teri bahen di… oye madar¬†@#$%¬†… oye bahen @#$$. Almost every Delhiite understands Punjabi to an extent. PUNJABI unites everyone.
  14. You call the waiter in the restaurant “boss” or “Pappey” & tack on “yaar” “bhai” to almost every sentence.
  15. You know that Pappay Da Dhaba or Kake Da Hotel has better butter chicken than Taj. You’ve at least tried it once! And you see a BMW, a Porsche OR a Mercedes parked outside it!
  16. You describe practically every other person on the planet as “Vella”. (‘Idle’ or Nikamma in Punjabi).
  17. You see middle-aged Aunties wearing Gucci shades and holding LV bags having Gol-Gappas in GK or Bhelpuri in South Ex along with Diet Coke !
  18. You call every stranger ‘Bhaiyya’.
  19. You refer to East Delhi as ‘Jamuna Paar’.
  20. You refer to AIIMS as Medical.
  21. Pretty girls as Totta, Maal or Bamb (Punjabi for Bomb).
  22. Aashiq mizaz boys as Majnu di Aulad !
  23. You dont buy tickets for a music concert or cricket match, but try to use¬†political contacts… of the deputy secretary of the chief secretary of the Minister of State for Khadi.
  24. You overtake everyone from the wrong side and stare into his/her eyes while doing so.
  25. You have at least two cars and a motorbike at home.
  26. And you have fought at least once every month with neighbors over parking…
  27. You park your Car and take a Auto-rickshaw to Lajpat Nagar / Rajouri/ Kamla Nagar/ Karol Bagh. But CP, you don’t get parking space easily, yet you go always in your own vehicle.
  28. And then you say apni Kanvense (conveyance) howe na ta badi Kanvinyance (convenience) hondi hai ji !!!!!
  29. You have bribed a traffic cop (Mama) at least once.
  30. You know that a farmhouse has nothing to do with cattle or farming. It is luxurious hangout for whole night.
  31. You use “contacts” (jugaad) for everything, from getting movie tickets to restaurant bookings to play-school admissions.
  32. You have had Anda parantha outside Vikram hotel and Bun Omlette at Dhaula Kuan, Kulfi at Karol Bagh, Gol Gappe at India Gate, Dosa at Madras Hotel, Chana/Kulcha at Scindia House and Chaat at UPSC.
  33. Metro rail is your Pride but you travel in your Car.
  34. You think going the mall for shopping is equivalent to walking the ramp at Milan fashion week. You break out all the labels, because when else will you use your Prada, Dior and Louis Vuitton bags?
  35. You feel indicating which way you are going to turn your vehicle is an information security leak.
  36. You are a good driver coz you are correct in your guess of what the driver in the front vehicle will do.
  37. The only time you went to the Chidiya Ghar (Zoo) was on a school picnic.
  38. You expect around 10 FM STATIONS in every city! Woho.!
  39. DESPITE all the good and bad……..You still Love Delhi…
  40. You keep singing ….. Dilli hai Dil Walon ki…..¬†Oye Balle Balle !!!

 

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A day in the life of a marketing executive.

If you work in marketing (and I know that you do);

then you will know that I am being very very true.

The life of a ‘marketer’ (as I like to call myself),

is absolutely, (and I mean truly) off the shelf! ūüôā

I know I sound cheesy with all these short lines,

It’s all the more worse ‘coz every other 1 rhymes.

So getting back to what I was originally saying,

That the life of a marketer is worth craving.

There’s so much running around that you don’t have to exercise,

There’s so much creativity that you can’t help but sigh! :-S

The best part about marketing is the secret inside

that marketers, never casually take things in their stride

They seriously listen and ponder, to understand your ways

But beware, because for mean-ness they’ll make you pay.

Whatever your designation, you’re just some glorified¬†fire fighter,

You can be President of Marketing but you will still be called a marketer.

I just realized how this is not just about a single day,

this entire poem is about marketers everywhere.

Marketing execs as people like to call them,

you can love ’em, you can hate ’em, but honey you just can’t ignore ’em.

They are flashy but harassed and annoyingly accurate,

you can wrangle them, push them but boy are they sarcastic.

We are moody, sometimes shady and but we are always so right

We are efficient, intelligent and never out of sight.

My job of a marketer, may not be as big,

may not be as fancy as VP or Country Head.

That’s the thing about marketing, it’s so wonderful,

that without me your business would just fall and crumble.

Who would do your branding, your promotion and your stage

that needs to be set up to make you look great.

So, next time you forget it, I’ll say it out loud,

think about it before you boss a marketing executive around.

Road to modern marketing

Road to modern marketing

The first of many letters to my nephew Vihaan

Dearest Darling Vihaan,

How are you sweetheart? I know you’re too young to read this right now, but eventually one day you will, and it will surely make you laugh.

You are almost 6 months¬†old, and its hard to imagine what things were like 6 months ago, before you were born. I’m sure your mom and dad will tell you how eagerly everybody has waited for you to arrive, and you’re mom will enlighten you on all the things that happened while she was carrying you in her tummy (my mom tells the¬†weirdest¬†stories about me, making it sound like I played soccer while I was inside her-lol). We waited for months for you to come and enrich our lives with your existence.

I know that by the time you read this letter 2013 may actually be pre-historic times for you but sweetie, this is the year we realized how 1 person’s presence in our life can bring so much joy. You ARE a bundle of joy- beautiful, melodious and so charismatic I mean your aunts and uncles and grandmas and grandpas across India and the world are all waiting everyday for a new picture of yours to be uploaded on Facebook or to receive a video of you laughing so we can have one glimpse of you and bask in the¬†glory of your awesomeness. ūüėÄ

You will never fully realize the effect you have had or the meaning of your presence but even so, know that you are loved and protected and shared by so many people. ¬†You are our second generation, and it starts with you. Your mom, your Aunt Shyna and I were talking about how we have now shifted into a different era. It is a new era, and it’s NOW, it’s here!!! In some way, your mom actually ushered the new era in, at least for us. ūüôā

Meeting you was such a joy and a treat, that leaving you was actually sad. I wish we had more time together but we have years and years to make up for it. You are our rockstar, the apple of our eye and without even knowing it, you make us proud every day, every minute.

God Bless you!!!

xoxoxo

Aunt Divya